September 06, 2010

sempat kut?

[CONTINUED]

Why the secrets? Why am I not sharing anything? Why am I so kedekut? Orang lain kongsi ini itu ini itu, and here I am just reading others' blogs and occasionally commenting and emailing others to ask about things. Bukan kedekut, bukan tak mahu share. Bukan, bukan, bukan.

BUT I LOVE IT ALL TO BE MY OWN LITTLE MYSTERY, you know? Just in this moment, when I am busy preparing.

Macam tak masuk akal pun ada juga, saya tahu. In fact, sometimes, Mister pun rasa the same. Like how I hid my baju nikah from him for months before the engagement sebab saya memang taknak dia tengok what I will look like during the nikah yet. We bought our wedding outfit from the same place on the same day pulak tu, tapi masa tengah fitting pun, only Mama saw me in it. Only during the engagement did he know that we will have matching nikah outfits. Sebelum tu, I tricked him into believing the whole “kita match tapi tak sama colour” idea. You should have seen how he reacted. Terlalu comel, tapi only for me to remember.Hee.

Lagi 3 bulan lebih from now, tengok lah puas-puas, okay?

Tak teringin ke nak tunjuk this and that sikit-sikit? MESTI LAH. Are you joking? We are women, dah pasti ada a little bit of teringin nak share and get reviews. Tapi, sebab kita dah tahu ada perempuan lain jugak perangainya tak berapa nak semenggah, we know better. Simpan saja, sampai semua dah selesai. Bila dah selesai semuanya, saya pasti akan review, insyaAllah.

Anyway, back to the main story. Sempat ke?

Sebenarnya, sempat atau tidak sesuatu tu depends a lot on the magnitude and scale of the event. Oleh sebab saya seorang yang simple pimple (ada ke?), rasa macam tak perlu nak elaborate sangat the entire thing. It would be so unlike me and I wouldn’t like that.

With me, what’s important is that jangan last minute, jangan argue, and jangan berkira. If taknak tolong, jangan cakap apa-apa dan tak perlu tolong. Serious tak terasa. But if nak tolong, sila ikhlas, jangan mengungkit. If nak suggest, tolong jangan paksa. Kalau saya tak stress, tapi awak nak stress, jangan buat saya stress jugak. Sebab saya yang nak kahwin dan saya ada stresses saya sendiri. Pada prinsipnya, saya seorang yang simple. Kalau nak lebih grand dari simple, sila tolong bayar.

Senang bukan? Hmm..

Eh, saya bukan sedang stress, tolonglah percaya. Saya cuma nak cakap that sometimes, ada perkara-perkara yang tak perlu distresskan. Saya tahu that sometimes, bila tengah bridezilla mode turned on to the most maximum level, console macam mana pun, kita masih nak jadi yang paling betul dalam dunia ni. Biarpun kita tahu that at least some percentage of it, kita ada salahnya juga. Iye, saya pun pernah bridezilla juga.

Contohnya, at 4 months and 4 days (ye, saya specific begini), I went through a huge bridezilla moment. Perlukah cerita kenapa? Bagi saya personally, tak perlu. Bila saya tulis, orang baca and the problem prolongs sebab kita dah membuatkan dia menjadi permanent. Jadi, duduk diam-diam minum neslo (maaflah, masa tu tak puasa) lepas tu, masalah tu akan berlalu.

Percayalah. Masalah itu akan berlalu. Menulis tentang masalah itu akan lebih menyakitkan. Dan kadang kala boleh buat kita menyesal membacanya semula. Sebab kita dah termarah, termaki dan terkutuk. Kadang-kadang involve orang tersayang. Yang dah ditulis, tak akan boleh ditarik semula. Walau delete 100 kali pun.

Tapi buat begini kalau hati tu kental saja la. Bila tak kental, sila call kawan-kawan baik untuk mengadu. Mereka juga mungkin ada masalah yang mereka perlu luahkan jadi anda call, dia pun boleh senang hati bercerita skali (ini true story heeheeh). See, can kill 2 birds with 1 stone. Very efficient.

Apa pun, semuanya baik-baik belaka, insyaAllah. Walaupun banyak juga perkara-perkara yang masih “Merah”, I am going to stay positive as much as I can. I want to make this as memorable and happy as I possibly can.

Like Hadi said when he called me the other day,

"Typical of you Kak. You’re always about the memories."


Jawapan kepada soalan asal? InsyaAllah, sempat.





Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

4 comments:

ZARA said...

hey u. nak cepat td lupa pulak ur id is freespirited.

anyway. i was about to post something like this b4 i decided maybe i should toned it down a little hence that he's just not that into you post.

kitorang tak da buat majlis tunang pon, takda sanding takda pelamin gempaq. just two ppl excited to be united.

If you notice now ramai b2b yang nak start private kan blog. i pon macam ada rasa nak buat jugak. sbb it was fun at first sharing, tapi lama realize that by sharing i just limit myself to little choices.

i tak suka sama dengan orang. sincerely. if possible everything nak lain hence my taste in music, fashion etc. tgk paramore dulu tak ramai org tau sekarang minat rempit pon tau sape paramore. so mmg bye bye paramore lah kan?

i only share things that i dont mind sama yg i know not many ppl will want to follow. like my honeymoon plan. sapa yg sanggup nak backpacking sampai ke NZ on their honeymoon. plus its summer kat sana. i dont think so.

begitulah story mory i. tak kedekut lah u! serious! i sokong 100% u! honestly i prefer u just the way u r!

p/s: i love ur writing!!

freespirited12 said...

hai! i macam dah boleh agak dah yang you forgot that that is my "nick" hahahaha. i thnk i should change to my real name so that orang tak confused.

i slalu risau jugak orang ingat i kedekut takmo cerita. sebab i'm linked on some blogs as a b2b kan. so mesti orang bengang je sebab i tak share anything.

likewise, my dear. i like to be the only one with that one thing. walaupun sometimes, tak boleh elak because how different can weddings be? hehehe.

tapi apape pun, im glad someone understands that its not that i don't want to share. it's just that i love being in my own mysterious world.

Mister pun tak tahu apape, orang lain, lagi tak tahu apape :)

glad you like my writings! :)

Peri Ungu said...

i setuju. keep it to yourself. i dulu mula2 macam sangatlah excited nak blog about my preps and all, pastu i figure, kat luar sana mesti ada orang yg nak menyibuk lebih2 semua. and i also like to be mysterious. semua2 lah. so just keep it to yourself. senang. tak yah pikir orang. and of course i agree with zara yang kita mesti nak lain dari orang lain! walaupon sedikit. :)

Haneesa said...

Peri Ungu:
yes, betul tu. i pun macam rasa excited nak write about certain things. tapi at the same time, i like it to be my own little mystery. baru syiok! bila dah selesai nanti baru akan tulis semua balik :)

part yang lain dari yang lain tu, i rasa semorang pun nak sikit lain. walaupun kita tau that its a bit susah sometimes :)