November 30, 2010


A piece of my mind.

I hate to talk about work because I know there are silent readers at work who actually read this and when they meet me in the office, they either look me straight in the eye with the “I know” look or evade me altogether because they know things about me, some of which I don’t really want people to know.

But like I said, I write. And I have tried to go private with this blog before and that didn’t help with anything at all.

So, I don’t care. Let’s talk about work.

We are currently in the process of organising some event for Mid December. Organising yourself, organising a trip, organising events and organising events at work are all different facets of the same thing; each with their own modus operandi, each with different requirements.

Thing about organising events at work is that it is work, so there are certain procedures you need to adhere to and a lot of people who get away with just about anything. And then, there are people like ME, who do EVERYTHING.

For the past 2 weeks, my phone has not stopped ringing. People with queries, people with problems, people with doubts, people with no money. All kinds of people. I am a people person, so really, I am okay with that actually.

What I am NOT is someone who TOLERATES people who aren’t team players. I mean, it’s easy to say that you don’t know how to do something and just play dumb isn’t it? When people ask you whether or not you are used to organising events, you can simply say NO and get away with it?

What the Hell?

I can’t and won’t say the same because I know how capable I am and can be, but sometimes, when people get away with just about anything, just because they say they DON’T KNOW, that pisses me off BIG TIME.

I wonder what that huge paycheck is for? Isn’t it for you to learn things which you don’t know? Isn’t it for doing everything that your boss asks you to do? IF I CAN, I DON'T SEE WHY ANYONE ELSE CAN'T.

If someone of such stature can just act dumb AS IF s/he REALLY does not KNOW anything, whereas, all that person is doing is to not care enough to actually LEARN, I don’t know what is going to happen to us.


I sometimes just give up with the system where people get away with anything.

Oh, oh. The best part is that when it comes to showing that you actually DO some work, like being the liaison officer for some big shot, LAJU GILA JE.

I GIVE UP. Lebih baik berhenti kerja je. No, not me, but those yang tak buat kerja sungguh-sungguh tu.

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November 29, 2010

jump baby jump.

the one i like is a combination of number 7 in first picture and 4 in second picture.

Fashion and I, we have never really been in tandem.

I have gone through years before now, where I tried hard to be someone else, so hard that I even dressed (or attempted to) dress like them and now that I am more comfortable in my own skin, I figured that I should, by all means, wear something which I am most comfortable in.

After all, beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.

Since yesterday was my (window) shopping day, I wanted to try many, many things on. But of course, you only have so little time and so much to do, so I couldn’t. But I made it a point to try the one thing I have always wanted to try on – jumpsuits.

I’m scrawny.

Though I don’t really believe it when people tell me that I’m small because I’m not the small kind of small as in Super SS kind of small, but like I’ve mentioned before, I have to, to a certain degree admit that I am scrawny because of my disproportionate body stats.

So, anyways, we went to this shop called Message. Some of their pieces are like dirt cheap! They can go for as low as RM9 per piece at times. But the jumpsuit I saw didn’t cost that cheap, of course. But I tried it on anyway.

I’ve got to say that I was surprised with the reflection I saw in the mirror…

In my head, I never thought I would look like I did yesterday. Although I did make fun of the jumpsuit at first,

“Adik, rasa-rasa seluar dia nampak macam seluar PJK kita masa kita kecik-kecik tak?”

“Adik tak rasa ke bontot Akak nampak macam jatuh pakai ni?”

And Adik goes,

What bontot?”

“ T_T" ”


Anyways, I went home happy and satisfied, knowing that the one thing I have never really considered wearing, but always wondered what I would look like in, actually looked good on me. I am actually contemplating about buying it, although I wished it didn’t cost as much as it did.

Korang weekend ni apa theme colour dia? *grins sheepishly*

Where are we going? And what’s the plan? My mom has given the green light. Do I need to wear something new or something blue? Hahaha. Mengada.

Because that jumpsuit is navy blue. *drools*

Probably I should stop at OU after work today.

Oh, did I already mention how lucky I feel to have a little sister? Adik, tak payah la pergi sekolah :(

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

We’re taking everything off.


Yesterday, I got my very much needed break.

My siblings brought me out (although I was the one who drove), HAHA and we headed to One Utama, where else. One Utama, the “playground” which I have not visited for eons now since OnlyGodKnowsWhen.

Since I was a little jakun and the Year End Sales have begun, I think I stopped at almost all shops to try this and that. Shoes are selling like hot cakes and the prices are so reasonable I felt like bagging everything that I liked! But of course, I didn’t.

That’s because I had something else in mind. Adik went shopping earlier last week and she was one happy monkey when she came home, alright. Turns out that she bought new girly-essentials for to-die for prices! I didn’t know how therapeutic buying girly-essentials could be. That was until yesterday, of course.

I mean, I have always known that splurging and spending money can somehow make you one happier cow, but buying girly-essentials brings you to another euphoric high altogether! I kid you not. I got 5 girly-essentials for an amazing price and I feel amazing. The salesgirl was really helpful too and I’ve got to say, she’s got some class. She picked all 5 girly-essentials in all kinds of colours and I bought them all. It’s as if she knew my taste or something!

Next time you go to Audrey , Parkson One Utama, look for Cynthia. She’s a great salesgirl. She also doesn’t make you feel so awkward when she teaches you how to wear it right.

Gee, I really had no idea they could make me so happy. Haha, you can count the amount of exclamation marks as proof of how excited I am.

Yes, I know that the promotion has ended, but I still think that they are priced more reasonably than some other brands even when the sales are not on. And I’m sure there are more promotions to come in the future because hey, this is the Year End Sales period, isn’t it?

I sure do love this period, alright ;)

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

November 26, 2010

my heart soars.

You have no idea how the littlest thing can end up being the biggest thing to ever matter.

You have no idea how one text message can make one person's world turn around.

You have no idea how little it takes to make a person's heart soar.

I am feeling on top of the world right now.

I feel like crying, laughing, smiling and jumping up in the sky.

I feel like hugging anyone who passes by me just to prove how happy I am.


My heart soars. Just because. ;)

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

November 25, 2010

the choices you make.

Last weekend we attended Batul’s wedding.
(I will eventually blog about it, just not right now okay?)

It was a really, really hot day. It got me thinking about what I would love on a hot day. An umbrella? Ice cream? A cold drink? Cendol? Air-cond? A good book? Or what?

Then, it got me thinking about choices. In a world where most things come easy, we have never been faced with a situation where we are asked to choose between 2 (or more) very essential things. Because we know that we can afford to have it all. But what if we were asked to pick just 1 out of 2 choices? Which would we choose?

The things I can think of, just off the cuff at the moment would be:

Water vs. electricity?

I choose water. Travelling around the world has taught me that you can go crazy without water.

Drink vs. Food

I would pick drink, of course. I cannot go a day without plain water.

Losing your wallet vs. losing your handphone/smartphone (whichever is applicable huahuahua perli diri sendiri)?

If it were up to me, I wouldn’t want to choose any of the 2 but to be very, very honest, I would hate losing my phone more than losing my wallet. All those contacts are very, very important!

Mother vs. Father?

Tough, isn’t it? Of course you don’t want to choose. But what if God asked you that question? Which one would you pick? Would you be able to live with yourself for making that choice, whichever that may be?

Well, these are just some of the things I can think of at the moment.

When I think of these tougher choices, it makes every other choice I have to make seem trivial, doesn’t it? Like whether I should get a BB or an iPhone. Or whether I prefer a holiday in a hot or cold country? Or whether I should go out for lunch or stay in. Or whether I prefer Blogspot or Wordpress?

Come to think of it, the more trivial things are just about opportunity cost, rather than real choices, right?

But of course, I suspect that this revelation would probably only last for 3 days for me, tops, since we do get everything pretty easily nowadays. We are, after all, a generation which is spoilt for choice.

But I really do wonder, for all those 4 things I thought of just now, which would you choose?

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

November 24, 2010

please, bear with me.

I am the kind of girl who writes.

Yes, I write. My blogging “career” (so-called, I don't even have NuffNang) began for illogical reasons, but for some reason, this is the only form of social networking which I am not willing to lose or give up unless my life depended on it.

I don’t mind that I am no longer active in Friendster. I don’t care much about MySpace. And I haven’t logged on to my Facebook account for the longest time now, only getting notifications and messages via email and I really don’t have a care in the world for what goes on there, but this blog,

I make the time for.

It may seem like I am taking too much time off during work to spend here. Or that I curi tulang in a way or another. But to me, it’s better than me bitching about some stranger or not so stranger with other people during office hours. Either its better or its just the same.

Either way, it’s better for me to write about what I observe and what I feel (I think) while keeping people’s identities safe, rather than talk about specific people who I sometimes think don’t really deserve to be bi**ched about so much. By nature, I’m not really mean, so it sort of hurts to talk about other people too much especially if I don't really have much of a problem with that person.

I love reading my old posts. Really, I do. No matter how chauvinistic that may seem to you. And no matter how stupid some posts are.

Sometimes, I read my posts from 4 months back or it could be from 2 years back. Just to see what it was that was going on in my life back then, and how I handled it. And then, I learn. It’s amazing how much you can learn from yourself. Honestly, try it and you’d be surprised.

I am in the process of learning something about myself at the moment. And I concede to the fact that I have been too overwhelmed with some things off late so much so that it affected the bigger picture which is more important.

I am learning every single day, that learning is an ongoing process.

The difference between me and you and you and you and all of you is the path we are learning on and the ways in which we are take those lessons to heart.

I feel like spilling words on my blog today. So, please bear with me ;)

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

Swiftly now.

If anyone were to ask me my favourite song, it would be?


And my second favourite song is,

Tim McGraw!

Artist? Taylor Swift!

I feel like such a teenager for liking her songs. I know that they by right, should appeal to those in their teens, but really, I can’t help it. When she sings, it’s as if she is speaking to you from the heart ‘til you find it possible to relate to her in one way or another.

So, yes, my favourite song is Fifteen and I think Taylor Swift is pretty. So what?

I've always loved her songs. But this whole Swift thing reached a high when we were watching the American Music Awards. She has grown so much from the first time I downloaded (ooops) all her songs without knowing how big she really is going to be. And when we were watching the AMAs, her great talent really just shone through.

We were quizzing: Whose concert would we go to if that artist came to Malaysia?

Swift’s definitely!

The rest just disappointed me with their terrible live voice! Especially Rihanna, Katy Perry and even Enrique! (panggil nama macam kawan-kawan pulak). It’s apparent now that even if you’re a great singer, you may not be as popular as those with good songwriters and good choice of songs.

Because from the looks of it, great songs sell, but great voices don’t really.

Anyway, the next time you so much as get a whiff of news that she is coming to Malaysia, please do tell me. I probably will be one of the older ones in the crowd T_T", but I really do think that her songs are nice and very singalongto.

And did I already mention that she is gorgeous?

Hmm. Terasa macam sick fan pulak.

But seriously, okay? Siapa nak bawak saya pergi Swift concert? My last concert was some time May this year. Ish.

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

November 23, 2010

did you miss me on blogspot?

Dear Facebook Visitors (and regular visitors as well of course),

I know that you are all wondering. I have never gotten this much traffic from Facebook before and the past week has been the most yet.

I know you are wondering.

I know you are waiting for me to come out here, give a story because word has it that I must tell the story, even if I tell it to myself, and no one else.


This blog is my happy place.

When I first began blogging some time in 2004, I opened my old, now private blog, so that I could talk about my heartache. Because you’ve got to remember that at some point, people stop listening because their lives move on. And so, you find your own way to move on too.

So, I talked to myself.


This blog is my happy place.

Out of all the blogs I created, this is the only one which began with my 22nd birthday. Best year of my life so far.

So, I’d like to keep this blog my happy place.

Though I sometimes forget that even blogging has a (silent) standard rule of thumb of its own.

This past week has been taxing, emotional, reflective. People make mistakes without realizing. People forgive. People love. Love or the lack of it can move one’s world in ways unimaginable.

Let’s begin again. But in baby steps.

If you miss me rambling, I miss me rambling too.

But sometimes, you’ve got to do what you’ve got to do.

As of now, I have no comment. Even if a lot of you are wondering (I think) about my version of things. I really, simply, have no comment.

Love or the lack of it can move one’s world in ways unimaginable.

And as of now, my favourite quote would be:

"Hawa dijadikan dari tulang rusuk kiri Adam.
Bukan dari kepala untuk dijadikan atas,
bukan dari kaki untuk dijadikan alas,
tetapi dari sisinya,
dekat di lengannya untuk dijadikan teman hidup,
dekat dengan hatinya untuk disayangi.."

We make mistakes, we learn everyday. And we thank Allah for that opportunity.


Love, Me

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November 15, 2010


For your own post rahsia, here's the tutorial.

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

November 12, 2010

kotak katik.

One more lesson I am learning from all this wedding preps is that… boxes aren’t easy to fold. My parents went to Sin Yin on Wednesday to collect the boxes and since I was able to go home earlier on Wednesday, I began folding them.

My target? 50 boxes per day.

So that means that I’ll be done in about 3 weeks (supposedly). And that also means that the production line, which includes Mama and Adik can start decorating them memandangkan mereka berdua creative and Adik lebih kental *Adik je faham*. And that also means that I can begin folding the boxes for nikah pula. And also boxes for kids.

Sungguh tak creative kan? Balik-balik guna boxes.

Tapi percayalah, when your household is only made of so few people and safe and easy transportation of goods from home to venue is the main concern, you have to choose something practical. Mungkin we’ll get adventurous with the VIP doorgifts. Maybe saja lah.

Anyways. On Wednesday night, I only managed to finish 10 boxes. I began at 10 p.m. and finished at 12 a.m. I don’t know how long I took just to figure out how to lipat the lines on the boxes apatah lagi nak melipat box menjadi box dengan betul. I only got the hang of it at the 9th box.

Untuk puaskan hati, I decided to buat another box after the 10th box.

So, all in all, 11 boxes in 2 hours. Kalau kerja kilang pasti dah kena pecat. No doubt! Tapi apakan daya. Somehow, motor skills sedikit kurang on Wednesday hence the slow pace.

Semalam, lepas dinner (around 8.30 p.m.), I decided to start again.

My target? Finish the remaining boxes.

The only break I took was to bathe and to solat. Mission accomplished? No, sadly, no. By the time it was 12 a.m., saya dah terlentang atas lantai with the penutup of the box, half-folded. If Mama didn’t come up to my room, I think I would have remained asleep on the floor sampai pagi ni.

Achievement yesterday? 20 boxes dengan penutup. 10 boxes tanpa penutup.

Slowly does it, slowly. Aikenduit. Yeah right. Hey, of course I can, right right right?

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November 11, 2010

now, i know why.

I’d be honest.

When my friends were preparing to get married, I never quite understood why they didn’t have time for anything other than the wedding.

Now, I know that when you decide to get married, the wedding consumes a huge part of you. And any thoughts of marriage consume the whole of your life. No matter how excited you really are about it.

Considering how "aiman-tak-kisah" I am about my wedding preparations, I consider myself pretty worked up. Did you notice that when I blog nowadays, it’s quite impossible for me to not slot something in about love, life, family, relationship, wedding preparations and the like?


Ironic because I always told myself that I should not let my wedding consume me. Consumed about marriage tak apa kerana itu lebih real.

But I guess when you are the Bride-to-Be, you really can’t help yourself. There are a million things to think about and most importantly, a million hearts to take care of. Sometimes, the most important thing, which is yourself you successfully neglect.

And let’s not start talking about money issues. That’s a separate, never ending issue on its own.

I miss going out with my friends just because. I miss taking photos. I miss futsal. I miss splurging on good food because your priorities shift altogether. Don’t get me wrong. I do not mind spending on things like the photographer etc. because I know that those are the only things which would make my memories immortal. Plus, it’s not everyday that I have to buy hantaran. And even if I did, I’m thankful that both of us have agreed on certain thresholds, which in other words means that we’re both pretty reasonable and realistic about things.

But yes. It’s a catch-22 situation at times.

Most of all, I actually miss eating sushi. I know, right? That was just SO RANDOM. But I really do miss eating sushi. Maybe it’s because I miss Lynn. And I am grateful that despite the many things we don’t say to each other, she really just gets me.

Okay, soon, I will get out of the house and pamper myself to some fun-loving time. I will, I promise.

I will not tolerate the wrinkles around my eyes on the big day.

So, who’s in for sushi?

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

November 10, 2010

Wan Tanamera

Ever heard of that song before? I am not sure if that is the thing that they sing, but it sure does sound like that!

As promised here, I am now going to write about my Tanamera experience.

Be wary though, that I don’t splurge on spas unlike food and toiletries. So, my review might not be as holistic as it should be as it is not relative to anything else I have experienced before.

When we first decided to bring Batul to Tanamera, I just went along. I didn’t know where it is located or what the condition of the spa is like. One of the perks of having super efficient friends is that you can trust them with your life.

Now, I know that it is located at USJ 15 and it is strategic in the sense that you don’t exactly have to battle the traffic in the USJ 15 square itself. Parking isn’t aplenty, but if you don’t mind the heat and extra exercise, there are some parking lots a little farther away. But of course, you can always get someone to chauffer you around and drop you right in front of the place.

When we arrived, they told us to strip and left us with a pair of black disposable undies. Uuuu sexay!

Told us to lie face down and began massaging my legs and back. My masseuse was a little quiet. But I guess that’s because I wasn’t all that chatty as well. I just wanted to be pampered and I got my wish. By the time they told us to roll on our back (suruh baring terlentang) and began massaging my right foot, I was fast asleep.

I remained asleep while waiting for the scrubbing treatment and slept some more when they scrubbed me. I am not too sure what oil they used for the massage, but it wasn’t too overpowering. For the scrubbing treatment, they used coconut. If you are not a big fan of coconut, you might find that a little bit disturbing. But I am not particularly petty so, I didn’t mind.

All in all, I didn’t feel any pain at all. Though my masseuse was very quiet, Mamita’s was very attentive and asked on and off whether or not we were ticklish or whether anything hurt. Other than that, with the ambience of the room and the soft songs and sounds of nature playing in the background, I feel like I got my much needed rest and pampering session.

Of course, after the massage and scrub, we had to take a bath. The shower is a tad bit small. Tapi lama gila la aku mandi kan. Siap shampoo 2 kali lagi.

After that, I felt rejuvenated! But at the same time, rasa haus gila, gila, GILA! And sleepy as well. Which explains why I drank my milo dinosaur at Pappa Rich dalam sekelip mata and also makan kuey teow sup saja sebab mengantuk sangat.

The treatment took several hours. We began at 2 p.m. and it all ended at around 5 p.m.. And that was only for massage and scrubbing treatments. As for the rest, unless my friends leave a comment in the comment box, I am not in the position to review on their treatments. All I know is that we all took different ones and have our own experiences.

I would definitely go back there and ask them to massage my legs some more.

Plus it would be nice to reunite with black disposable panties.

Have never seen those before, even in pharmacies. Hehehe.

Website is here.

And oh, by the way, NO, my masseuse did NOT massage my breasts.

Unlike the gory stories I’ve heard before. So yes. That should put your mind to ease. 

I felt so clean after that. No doubt. You should try!

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

November 09, 2010

what i am not saying.

I've been talking alot to alot of people and I have been listening to what they have to say.

What I fail to remember is that the paramount consideration is what I feel about things, more than anything else. Yes, opinions matter to me because they belong to those who matter to me. But, like I said, bottom line is that I must know exactly how I feel about things.

I did my fact finding and talked some more to more people. Would it make it any better if I talked some more? I doubt it.

My concerns are real. They are as real as concerns can get. They are not as silly as I thought. And I am, by all means, entitled to feel and think them. As every normal person would. I know that now.

What I fail to remember is that some people are listening to what it is that I am not saying. And even then, those concerns remain real as well. 

Of course I have doubts. But at the same time, if no one takes the risk, then, who would?

What are the odds? 

I do not know. 

Bottom line is that I don't have the answers to life and don't think I ever will get them. 

I am not depressed. Just confused. 

In the end, someone's got to give me credit for thinking of the things which I am not saying. No matter how silly. Because they are real. This will get better eventually. I know it will. 


Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

water princess.

Our dear friend is getting married really soon. Like 2 weeks kind of soon.

And so, after numerous FB threads, drama, messages and reminders of all sorts, we held a Bachelorette Party for her.

As with all the ex-B-2-B’s in our group, we booked Batul for the entire day. And told her that she would need a change of clothes. What we all failed to tell her was that a change of clothes includes her inner wear. So kesian. T_T"

She needed a change of clothes because we went here!

Oh, boy, we had such a treat, I tell you! We purchased the tickets with access to all 3 parks; Wildlife, Extreme and Wet Park, if I am not mistaken and we began our journey with the Wildlife Park, which to me, honestly, was not that impressive.

And after going round and round the place, trying to look for an exit out of the Wildlife Park, I made the mistake of promising the B-2-B that “anything the B-2-B wants, she gets”. Damn, I honestly thought that Mamita would play along but she bailed out on me after seeing The Ship hang vertically upside down, up in the sky. The whole time I was up that ride, I kept screaming, “OMG I AM DYINGGGGG!”

Haha. So much drama. Turns out that that was the best decision I made at Sunway Lagoon!

Thereafter, no ride could scare me anymore. Batul knew the place well enough to recommend rides to us. We went on a couple of slides and took a dip in the pool, where we spent most of our time camwhoring.

I know that we all wished we stayed a little longer at Sunway Lagoon, but we had to go someplace else and had made bookings. At around 1+, we left Sunway Lagoon and headed to our next destination, which is not known to any of us, apart from Jaja and Nadnad.

I shall blog on my Tanamera experience in a separate post. But the B-2-B’s words were, “It felt like heaven in there. I feel like I’ve just come back from heaven”. Well, glad you liked it dear! Because we loved it too. Hehehe.

Now, post-Tanamera part was a little bit tricky. If you have been following this blog, you would know that this is not our first. And so, it becomes a little bit difficult to cover up our plans, especially when one of us “disappears” and tells the B-2-B that something came up. It was a whole load easier when Din was around because he normally wouldn’t join in during all the girly activities and set up the place meanwhile. But since he had some family matter to attend to, we had to make do with Nadnad and Zaki being the runner.

Thing about my friends and I is that… we’re not very convincing liars. Hmmph. T_T"

After several sesi kantoi and also numerous detours, the Deco Master told us that the place was ready! *added note: notice the bright colours and lovely scarves? the theme was Bollywood and mommytobe was nice enough to scout for the scarves for us* Yeay! So, we headed for Mantra at Sunway Pyramid, which serves Indian and Asian cuisines. The food was AMAZING! Okay, maybe it is not my place to say since just I ordered this:

bantai kena gelak. spicy n sour kuey teow. hey, but it was yummy!
But I did taste the rice, naan, etc. and it was amazing! Thanks to Din for recommending the place!

The grand finale was of course the cake. Though we were a tad bit confused as to why the staff put candles on it. Like whyyyy??? But we didn’t fuss much about it. Then, TADA! We presented the B-2-B with “Ourbook” which was specially made for her by the one who couldn’t be there.

ourbook :) *genius idea*

Okay, she ended up in tears. Which is rare because Batul hardly ever cries :')

We ended the night with loads of photos and lots of hugs and promises that we would see each other soon. Overall, it was a day very, very well spent and I hope that Batul enjoyed the day as much as the rest of us did.

Despite all the glitches.

We love you. You know that we really do :)

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

November 08, 2010

this goes out to you.

Has it been that long already?

Yes, apparently it has been almost 5 days since my last update. Fah spent the entire week at my place since I had to stay home alone and the rest of the girls came to join the mini sleepover later during the week. Well, I still had to go to work, of course. And I feel so sorry for not being able to spend more time with them, but I couldn’t help but feel so super knackered (especially on Thursday night) and up until today, I feel a little bad for not going out for supper with them like I said I would. I am so sorry!

But we sure did have a lot of fun on Friday, didn’t we girls?

If there is one thing I surely get from my cousins when we have mini sleepovers like this, it would be youth. Yes, of course, I am still a youth by definition, but with all the things going on in my life, it becomes increasingly difficult to enjoy life as it is. And sometimes, no one and nothing else is the source of your misery apart from yourself. Tricky, huh? Yes, very.

finally got the photos from Na. Tq awak!

My cousins are by far some of the most addictive people on earth. It’s difficult to stifle laughs or to resist going crazy because they have insurmountable amounts of energy and go loco just about all the time over every little thing! But beneath all that, there is a depth that not many people know.

We had a little talk about family and life on Friday and came to the conclusion that there is always something lacking in our lives, like it or not. Finding a balance is difficult, but it isn’t impossible. We try as much as we can.

We also talked about Atuk’s passing and how it has changed us. In the end, we are just glad that all of us have made commendable efforts so far in keeping us (cousins at least) together as much as we possibly can.

We also then talked about the hijab.

For some inexplicable reason, Na (youngest of the pack) consulted me when she thought of wearing the hijab. Of course, I was flattered when she turned to me for advice, but I still think of it as a little ironic, seeing that I don’t wear it myself.

It’s not that I’ve never thought of wearing it before and trust me, my mom reminds me constantly that it is wajib. But like me, she wants me to be ready. Really ready.

To my parents, prayers (solat 5 waktu) is the most important amalan I must observe. If I don’t pray, I get it from my dad and I get it really bad. If I wear something too revealing, I am asked to change my clothes immediately. But they don’t bug me about the hijab as much because to them, piety should come from within, not the other way round.

After several consultations (yes Na, I keep tabs, I’ll charge it on Daddy’s account ;p), Na made a decision and took that bold step. I think she made the best decision because at such a young age, people have no reason to judge, hate you or talk in the adverse about you and eventually, people come to love and accept you just because. It has not changed us one bit in terms of our relationship. In fact, I think in a lot of ways, it has made our bonds stronger.

Because we know that no matter what happens, we always find a way to make it all better for us and that the bottom line is love. And with love, comes acceptance.

And just like that, Na got the ball rolling. One by one, we are thinking of donning the hijab now. It has become so accessible and stylish, while at the same time decent that sometimes, I feel ashamed for being so afraid of not being ready.

I stopped at every shop I possibly could at Jalan TAR yesterday and if money were not the issue, I think I would have borong-ed all that I could. So that when the time comes, I would be properly prepared. Decency is definitely not boring. The world has proven that.

Na inspired me to be brave and insyaAllah, the time will come for me as well. Hopefully soon.

By the way, we love StyledCovered and Disuatu Pencarian. Great ideas.

Na just proved to me that wisdom doesn't always come with age. Tested and proven.

Now, Na, please email me the pictures in your phone. Peace, love you ;)

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

November 03, 2010

hati rindu.


Orang selalu kata kita tak patut melawan takdir.

Tapi ada juga orang kata yang takdir kita tak akan berubah jika kita tak usaha.

Doa adalah satu-satunya perkara yang boleh mengubah takdir. Betul ke?

Adakah kerana doa juga adalah usaha?

Walaupun doa merupakan usaha yang paling kurang sekali kalau mengikut skala usaha yang sebenarnya.

Kadang-kadang, doa anak itu lebih makbul.


Role reversal itu sesuatu yang menyakitkan, bukan?

Sekarang saya dah tahu apa rasanya. Masa mereka pergi hari tu, sebak di hati tak tertahan. Dah tak peduli lagi kalau nangis dekat office sekalipun. Nangis dekat office. Nangis dalam kereta. Nangis dalam shower. Nangis masa nak tidur. Mata bengkak. Ada aku peduli? Nope.

Setiap hari menunggu message daripada Mama and Babah. Setiap hari check macam mana cuaca di mana mereka berada. Setiap hari doa that the place where they are is peaceful and the flight “sky-worthy”.

Susah rupanya being the one on the receiving end. Selalu menunggu updates. Selalu menunggu berita.

Role reversal itu menyakitkan. Padan muka selalu buat mereka tertunggu-tunggu. Rasakan bayaran cash daripada Allah.

Alhamdulillah, despite everything, cuaca dua tiga hari ni cantik betul. 

Dan doa anak untuk ibu bapanya juga makbul semakbul-makbul doa juga, rupanya.

Ironic bukan? Masa ada, rimas. Bila tiada, rindu nak mampus. Cepatlah balik.

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)

November 01, 2010


Hello semua! (berapa kerat je yang baca pun, perasan!)

I have soo many things to update on, but have yet to find the time to update.

Sempena meraikan tepat 2 bulan to go (insyaAllah), di sini ingin disampaikan beberapa berita baik:

1. Ibu saya seorang chocoholic. Ini tiada kena mengena secara direct dengan berita gembira yang ingin saya sampaikan, tapi jika ibu saya bukan chocoholic, tak mungkin dia discover that Beryl's sedang sale! Yes, you heard me right! Beryl's sedang sale 20% untuk semua chocolates yang ada tag 20% sale, which is most of the chocolates! Bagi sesiapa yang tak pasti atau tak tahu Beryl's tu siapa, ermmm, saya pun tak tahu sebenarnya. All I know is that it is the best local chocolate I have ever tasted, sungguh, saya tak tipu! 

Location-wise, sangat sangat sangat senang nak jumpa. 

  • Exit toll UPM-Serdang, 
  • Go straight at the traffic light.
  • UPM is on your left.
  • Go straight on. 
  • Petronas on your left.
  • Several traffic lights along the way.
  • You will pass by housing area on your left.
  • All the while, PLUS highway is on your right.
  • Then, once dah habis all the housing area, look out for a building with blue roof. 
  • Ingat tu, BLUE ROOF!
  • Then, turn right at the chocolate factory with the blue roof. 
  • Park di mana-mana saja.

Kedai tu kecil, but as long as they have stock, they normally replenish the stock on the shelves.

Promotion ends? 4 November 2010! So, apa lagi? Pergi beli sekarang!

My personal favourite? This one.

image googled.
I am so obsessed with the whole quail egg look. Cantik! It's a tad bit sweet sebab it's white chocolate. But rasa dia sedap! If tak percaya sangat chocolate Beryl's ni sedap, sila la pergi sendiri. Ada banyak tester. Heee.

2. Siapa selalu pergi Jalan TAR mesti tahu Silk Street. After keluar dengan Mak Long, Mama sekarang dah confident pergi Jalan TAR sendiri... okay, fine, taklah sendiri, tapi Babah teman. Out of all the shops, dia selalu pergi kedai bernama Silk Street. Saya tak berapa nak pandai nak describe kain macam mana dia jual, because selalu sangat beli baju siap kan? But anyway, kalau Mama saya impressed dengan kedai tu, agak selamat untuk katakan that you would probably be impressed too.

Point is, Silk Street (Binwani's) sedang sale 50% on almost EVERYTHING that you touch! Termasuklah selendang/veil AND lace! Lace dia cantik menarik! Tak tipu! Tak sure branch lain dekat Alamanda, etc. sale atau tidak. Kalau kain yang anda suka tak cukup dekat Jalan TAR, dia akan carikan dekat branch lain.

So, siapa yang masih ada masa nak ke wedding dia, sila pergi ke Silk Street sekarang! Siapa tinggal lagi 2 bulan macam saya, sila redha dengan pilihan masing-masing sebab most tailor dah tak mahu terima tempahan dah pun T_T" (sebenarnya happy gila dengan pilihan asal, saja nak buat-buat emo)

Macam mana nak sampai? Alamak tak ingat pulak.... Oh dah ingat, dari exit Secret Recipe Sogo, turn right and walk down the road. Tak perlu cross because it is on the same side. Lepas tu, cari signboard. Hee. Langsung tak membantu. Tapi tak apa. Call dulu lah sebelum pergi. Takut weekend ni saja pulak dia sale.

3. Saya dah tahu Sin Yin Semua House kat mana! Okay, not a big deal for the rest of you, tapi bagi someone yang pemalas lipas nak DIY bagai dan malas nak redah Jalan TAR, this is a HUGE accomplishment to me. Sila pat on my back dan berikan tepukan gemuruh. Okay, saya akan DIY something and bahan-bahan hanya akan dapat mid-November. There goes my beauty sleep T_T".

Okay, enough newsflash for one night, right?

Sebenarnya, banyak gila lagi nak update, tapi penat sangat and esok is going to be a long working day and an emotional day for me sebab semua nak tinggalkan saya T_T". What's up with the T_T" pun tak tahu. Obsessed macam obsessed dengan quail eggs.

Okay, okay, fine dah, Good Night!

(rindu gila dekat blog!)

Shy to comment? Well, never mind! Your reactions mean the world to me! Make me smile today :)