the extra mile.

I finished my 12 kilometer run in about 1 hour and 42 minutes -- average of 12 minutes per lap (1 mile/1.6 kilometres). Not much to shout out about, but after all things considered, I would say it's no small feat either.

Here's the "funny thing" -- I thought that I had signed up for a 10 km run instead of 12 km and confidently told my husband so just the night before -- until I saw the distance of my run on my bib, which I later confirmed with the deets on my confirmation slip.

Don't.know.what.I.was.thinking. So, don't ask. 

What's important is that I didn't allow myself to become disheartened by my "minor mistake" (minor la sangat. difference of an extra mile plus is no joke!), decided to keep on pushing and going non-stop although I was starting to go half-crazy once I reached the 6 km mark and I finished without vomiting -- or falling or tripping or feeling like a total loser. 

I am just happy that I am now a 12 km finisher ;)

Running -- I think is one of those life-changing decisions I have ever made. EVER. 

Sure, I've always been active. Sure, I've always loved sports. But running such long distances, pushing myself to the limit and feeling absolutely empowered although I run real slow like a siput? Really, who would have thought running would have that kind effect on me, right?

I've got another one coming up in October and I'm all excited and sad about it at the same time. Excited because I love night runs; sad because it's the last one I signed up for, for this year.

Oh, well. Girl's got to do what she's got to do, right?

"...you can do everything and be everything…just NOT at all once." - Sleepless in KL.  Best honest advice I've heard in years.

Anyways, next run -- bring it on! (hopefully with more practice!)

go like never before.

101/365 was a couple of weeks ago.

Apart from the Big Move, I have got to admit that it was THE most anticipated weekend of 2015 because it was the only weekend that we or rather I knew what I would be doing; running my first 11.2 km for the year. Wait, scratch that; running my first competitive run, ever.

We made a pact; we would all sleep, even if we didn't feel like sleeping. I had a run that night and my husband had a basketball game the following morning. After all the packing-unpacking-repeat episodes we've had for about 3 weeks prior to 101/365, SLEEP really was the one thing we were lacking. 

So, sleep we did. 

When I woke up, I took a bath, waited to perform my Maghrib prayers and got ready for the Run. 

And just. like. that. came the rain, complete with lightning and thunder and all. 

I kept asking my husband for his opinion on what I should do. I knew what I wanted but I couldn't do it without knowing what he wanted. So, he told me that he would rather if I didn't run. Not because it was raining, because that was pretty normal... but because there was lightning and thunder and all. He said he would rather if I didn't. And my heart dropped.

Thing is, he knew that despite all my previous doubts and anxiety, I really was looking forward to that particular weekend. So he sent me to the venue anyway and told me to promise not to run if things got real bad. And by the look of things, I knew that I wasn't going to run that night. 

I kept of scrolling through the Twitter and FB updates from the organisers and at some point, I was already queuing to get my goodie bag and medal... when the rain STOPPED. And they announced that the first flag off would be at 8.45 p.m.

I got out of queue and stepped behind the Start Line.

Alhamdulillah, even though I didn't go as fast as I could have, I managed to run 8.2 km without stopping (only because I got a stomachache at the last 3!!!) and somehow managed to sprint the last 200 metres to the Finish Line.

I proudly finished my "Quarter Marathon" in 1:43:45 (net time). 

And I think it's somewhat contributed by the words of wisdom I found at the very last minute when I was still doubting myself- forever asking if I could - 

"I'm a runner because I run. Not because I run fast. Not because I run far."

Of course, I'm also ever so grateful for 2 of my biggest cheerleaders for cheering me on.

Already registered for my next competitive run (TMFR), so yeah... bring it on!

don't know if I (still) can.

I don't know why I thought I could in the very first place, but I at the time I signed up and paid RM60 to join the Shape Night Run, I knew that I could. I also thought that the renovation works would be over and done with by CNY and that we would now be staying at our New Place. But in reality, we're still tying up so many loose ends and have yet to pack a single thing in our current home. 

On top of that, Endomondo has been sending me motivational emails to encourage me to carry on with my training. Dalam bahasa kasarnya, it's telling me that it's time I get off my lazy butt. 

Thing is, I am far from lazy. I am just fatigued. To the core. And I swear I'm not even exaggerating the truth. I never understood why my mom used to feel so tired all the time when they were renovating the Bangi House but having gone through the experience of dealing with so many people and so many unmet timelines (yes, unfortunately), I totally get it now. I just don't feel like I'm up for anything. At all.

  I told this to my husband and told him of my intention to pull out from the Shape Night Run. So he told me to think of the many things I could have bought with the RM60 which I paid earlier and after spending so much money on the house, I for one, would really hate to waste that RM60. That, and the fact that I am not a quitter... so pulling out is so not me.

So, I went for my training last few days and it wasn't so bad--stamina-wise. The only thing bothering me right now is how badly my calves sting after I hit the 5 km mark and I need to go beyond the 5 km mark because... when I signed up earlier, I just had to challenge myself to join the 11.2 km since I thought of all the things I thought in first para above. 

I'll be needing loads of luck now. 

That, and a whole lot of training too. 

I really don't know if I still can. But I know that I should. Coz I'm a survivor, I'm going to make to it, I will survive, keep on surviving! 

#tibetibe

run strong.

Last week is what I would call a really, really long week. Really.

It was so bad that by the end of that working week, I couldn't remember what my husband wore earlier on Monday and kept on wondering if I was ironing the same clothes that we both had worn that Monday or Tuesday or whether that was something we wore the week before...

To top that up, I had "working mother issues" with my son, who seemed to sense that his hours with me after school had been cut short (duh, of course he realised, his daddy picked him up almost daily), which led him to refuse sleep and to start acting up unnecessarily.

And then, it rained every single day, which made my laundry chores a 100 times more difficult and it most definitely made training impossible. 

Yes, training. 

So, I joined my second Fun Run last Saturday morning, which was held in conjunction with the Court of Appeal's 20th Anniversary. I only had 2 aims for this time around, which is to - (i) run non-stop; and (ii) beat my own record. By Friday, due to the non-stop rain and long hours at work, I was pretty sure that my lack of training (only managed to "train" on the stairs everyday) would leave me disappointed at the end of the day. I even considered calling in sick on Saturday just to escape the embarrassment that would ensue.

However, one of my bosses told us that he would sponsor our race kit so there was definitely no way out. And most definitely, the pressure was threefold with him sponsoring my race kit because now, I had to worry about not disappointing him as well! 

So, when Saturday came, I prayed hard that I wouldn't faint during the run and just decided to have fun, as the name suggest...

That day, I discovered that - 

(i) despite being a sprinter for the most of my life, I was able to run 5.28 km non-stop;

(ii) my breathing technique played a pivotal role in making sure that I wasn't overly tired throughout the entire run;

(iii) I can run on just 4 pieces of cream crackers for breakfast, as long as I didn't drink anything cold that morning (and the 2 weeks preceding the run);

(iv) high protein meals really helped with stamina, however, carbs are important too. You just have to switch the portion for the 2;

(v) having short term goals for each run helps; and

(vi) although camaraderie is important in sports, you've got to know your own limits - don't fret if you're left behind or have no choice but to leave others behind.

Alhamdulillah, I managed to reach both my goals, which is to run non-stop, which lead me to break my own record (managed to finish the run in 39 minutes). Also managed to get Top 10 position, which is a bonus for me.

Wonderful things sure do happen when you put your mind to it, eh? 

Me with my running buddies. Possibly the only decent photo for that day.

that wasn't too bad.

It's Sunday.

I probably should stop telling you what day it is but it's kind of epic that I get to log onto my blog 2 days in row at home, so I guess I'm just a little... jakun, I guess?

Eheh.

 Today, I managed to complete what felt like the longest 5 kilometers I have ever ran in my life. As exhausted as I am, I am kind of proud that I managed to complete my run in 42 minutes, which I think is not too bad for a beginner like myself, ey?

Today I also managed to get one of the best afternoon naps I've had in the longest time. That was after I ate 2 breakfasts and took 2 baths.

Other than being totally wiped out after the whole Run, I really, really did have fun. In fact, I told my husband that I'm going to join another Fun Run before attempting my 10km run and that I plan on becoming a half marathoner before our second baby. Heheh. One can obviously dream, right? 

xxx

And right after I wrote that last sentence last night, I remember drifting off into a deep, deep sleep...

I guess I was totally and completely wiped out from the whole experience.


(In retrospect) it really wasn't that bad at all! Pada masa kejadian aku menyumpah lah jugak route Fun Run tu susah gila kot tak berapa nak fun!

However, safe to say that that definitely won't be my last!

(I'm at work today and doing perfectly fine, Alhamdulillah!)

Nah, gambar finisher, ewah.

all set.

It's Saturday.

I normally don't have the luxury of logging on to my laptop at home during the weekends (or during any time of the week, for the matter) but it's raining outside and my boys seem to be enjoying their "alone time", so I decided I'd enjoy mine too. 

As I said in my earlier post, alot of things have happened since the end of September. And although I haven't updated much on my "weight-loss" journey, I'm happy to report that I've managed to include some exercise into my lifestyle (in addition to my treadmill sessions (click here if you haven't read about it yet)), which in turn has made me feel so much better about myself.

I've got to admit though that my initial brisk walking/jogging sessions were excruciatingly painful for my limbs, wherein my legs and calves and heels burned each time my feet touched the ground, which I was supposed to expect I guess. After all, I have been out of the whole exercise scene close to 2 years now. 

But as I pushed through those sessions, my body began to acclimatise to my routines and I can now do about 5 kilometers of slow jogging in a commendable amount of time. After a while though, even after changing my routes for each session... I got a little bored...

So, this week's competition is timely.

Wait, what? A COMPETITION? After just about 2 months of "training" (I would hardly call it that!)

Uhuh. 

I've actually never joined ANY kind of run prior to this... so frankly, I'm kind of nervous!

To make things worse I've never been much of a cross country runner before, having sprinted through high school for the whole of 5 years... PLUS it's now the rainy season so I haven't had any practice AT ALL this week and the only 2 days when the sun shone brightly in the afternoon, I was held back late in the office! 

(excuses, mexcuses) 

Gah! I'm really a ball of nerves right now!

However, since the competition is TOMORROW morning (!!!) and I've already collected my Race Kit, I'm thinking, to hell with all my fears, I've got to start somewhere, so let's do this!

So, yes, wish me luck!

(Kecoh lebih, 5km je pun! Jangan gelak!)

Yeap, I'm all set.

#kiasu

Bahahahahaa.

unexpectedly good.

For as long as I can remember, I have never liked oats. Be it hot, cold, savoury, sweet, in a drink or in porridge; I just don't like oats. The ONLY form of oats that I DO like are those in cookies and in there, I'm not too sure how much nutrition is retained. 

So, when overnight oats took the world by storm... I didn't think much about it. However, it is hard to ignore when your Pinterest feed is full of them and each time you go on Google and key in the words....... O V E R, "overnight oats" are among the first few links on the list. 

Of course, I clicked on those links to see what the hu-ha is all about, especially now that I am on a quest to lead a healthier lifestyle. 

And after much deliberation, I decided to jump on the bandwagon. 

xxx

Before that though... although all the recipes call for the oats to be stored overnight in airtight containers... all I saw were pretty oats in pretty MASON JARS, which to be honest... is probably the only reason I didn't make the overnight oats any earlier than last night. 

Last night though... despite the absence of mason jars, I went on with my plan. I just had to make them to see what the hype is all about. 

Every time I trolled the internet for recipes, I saw that the key to making good overnight oats is the ratio of oat to liquid, which should always be 1:1. 

Since this is the first time I made them, I decided to try small portions first, just in case I hate them. 

result (colour) may vary, depending on lighting and filter used on your photo editor ;)

ingredients:

So, 1 portion of oats (mine is about 3 tbspns quickcook oats);

1 portion of liquid (mine is full cream milk)

2 tablespoons of sweetener (mine is Hershey's Chocolate Syrup);

1/2 a banana.

method:

The next best thing to a mason jar that I have is a Thermos container, specially made for cold food.

I put the oats in first.

Then the milk.

Then the Chocolate Syrup.

And then I put the lid on my container and shook it a bit. 

I then put the sliced banana onto the whole mix.

Put the lid on.

And put everything into the fridge.

I couldn't stop thinking about it last night! 

This morning, I reached the office, unpacked my coveted breakfast, put a few spoonfuls into my mouth... 

 And my verdict is?

I TOTALLY GET WHY YOU PEOPLE LOVE CHILLED OVERNIGHT OATS SO MUCH! It's no longer a mystery to me!

Sure, my oats aren't in a pretty mason jar. Sure they look all slimy and gooey (as they should, because when you shake your oat, milk and sweetener mixture, you'd discover that there is no way you can make these babies without all the slop), I would have liked it better if it had some crunch, so I might just go out and get myself rolled oats or steel cut oats and I wish my banana was riper... BUT they are healthy and nutritious AND they make breakfast so appealing. I have another jar in the fridge and I ain't sharing.

*googling more recipes*

[p.s.: total calories for this is - 259, the most coming from the chocolate syrup, which is 100 calories for 2 tablespoons *gasps!*]

Hanisa's INNOCENT breakfast.

Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, says everyone. 

And although I am not really a fan of breakfast, I'm now trying to pay heed to this piece of advice to avoid overeating during lunch, which I think has been the root of all evil to my "mysterious" weight gain. 

Please don't roll your eyes. I get enough of that from my husband. And despite all that, I'm still kind of obsessed with getting back my pre-marriage figure. *rolls eyes at myself*.

For a while (during Ramadan), I felt like my old self again. But as delusional as I am that I'd be able to maintain that kind of body without having to do much (just like old times, aahhh...), I knew that after I was done with puasa 6 (puasa 8 in my case)... I'd have a tough time resisting all the lemang and kuah kacang during open houses and open offices because surely, with everything being open, the only appropriate thing to do would be to open my mouth too, correct?

Correct. 

So to make myself feel better... I continued with my exercise sessions on my "treadmill", although my brother says that they are done in futility.

I started eating breakfast so that I won't be starving by the time lunch hour comes. 

I also started reading more health articles, which categorises my lifestyle as SEDENTARY, which I'm going to quit trying to change because I can't think of any solution that would work in everyone's favour for now.

And since my lifestyle is sedentary, I've decided to START COUNTING MY CALORIES, yey! (oh, yey?). For me to reach my goal weight (47kg BAHAHAHAHA), I can only consume 1000 calories per day (as set by myself)!

To track my progress, I downloaded a few apps on my phone. Problem is... these apps were not developed by locals, thus they (obviously) do not list the foods we Malaysians normally eat in the appropriate portion sizes. 

So, I kept one mobile app just to keep track of my daily food consumption (malas nak kira sendiri) and searched on the internet for the calories of the food and drinks that Malaysians normally consume. (click here for a start)

Since I now begin my day with breakfast (pats self on back)... that obviously became one of the first few things that I searched for. 

And? Surprise, surprise. 1/3 of my daily calorie allowance gone with this one INNOCENT meal - 

calorie count
Neslo (1 pack of Nescafe 3 in 1 with 3 spoons of milo) - 185 (like OHMYGOD kan?)
Gardenia wholemeal bread (2 pieces) - 146
Total - 331

Since nasi lemak telur mata is a staple for breakfast here in Malaysia and I obviously love it to the max, I looked it up too.

calorie count
Nasi lemak telur mata ayam - 669

I JUST DIED. 

Here's to sticking to my very innocent breakfast, I guess?

T__________________________T,,,,,

snug.

"Akak dah tembam kan", said my brother who I just met last week. 

Probably not the best thing to hear after not seeing him for a while, but it was probably what I needed to hear?

Adamant that he was wrong, I told him of my new routine of climbing up and down the stairs at work daily and how my diet hasn't changed at all i.e. I am not eating more than I used to and that I drink loads of water and that I don't snack at all. 

Nonchalantly, the just told me that it's probably no longer enough. Period. 

*Sigh*

Brothers can be so brutally honest, right?

Still a little shocked (well, not really) and in denial (mostly) I turned to my husband for support. And I know because he loves me and doesn't want to hurt my feelings, he was really diplomatic about it, all the while telling me that he didn't see the "slight" weight gain as a problem at all. And to prove that I was just drowning in my own paranoia, he told me to take the weighing scale out. He stepped on it first to make sure that it was working i.e. his weight was correct, and then came my turn. 

The weighing scale no longer showed the figures 51. It showed more than 51. And since there are 2 weighing scales in my parents' house, it showed more than 51, TWICE.

"That's not so bad!", says my husband (a little too) jovially. 

Well, if it were 51.5, I would still be okay (I think) but you can probably guess by now that it's way way way more than 51 right?

So, that day was spent in alot of confusion. 

Like, seriously. 

I suggested to my brother that all that weight was probably from the muscle I was building from climbing up and down the stairs. He dismissed it as being bollocks! He just simply said that the climbing is just not enough. Not anymore. 

xxx

I know for a fact that the struggle is different for every person. And my struggle is that I have never had a problem with eating whatever I liked as long as I drank enough water daily and as long as I didn't snack, which really isn't a problem for me at all.

 But lately... I've noticed that no matter what I did... everything I put on feels a little snug. Tummy, arm, hips, butt (basically sounds like everywhere right?) and I don't know why. Well, okay maybe one of the main reasons is that I'm in the process of weaning Luqman of the B so his consumption is less... but this weight gain is really rapid, especially after I reached 51 the other day. 

And regarding exercise, I know for a fact that the thing that works best for me is actually brisk walking, but hello, let's get real here... unless I have a maid to pick up after me and complete all the housework while I'm away, I will most probably never get the time to work out. Like seriously.

When I get back from work, I take out the food I defrosted earlier for dinner. Meanwhile, I put in a batch of laundry in the machine while cooking dinner. And then, I serve dinner and later wash the dishes and clean the table and clean the kitchen. And then, I pray and I put the kettle on. And then I iron our clothes for work and pack Luqman's school bag. And then, the washing machine beeps and I hang the laundry. And then, I soak Luqman's clothes and wash his bottles. If I'm lucky, I'll get to bathe, if not, Luqman would already be hanging by my feet asking me to play with him, which I normally oblige. And he would play and play and play until his eyes cannot take it anymore (usually around 11 p.m.) and he would want his milk. And he would want me to be right there with him. Sometimes I would fall asleep with him and awaken in the middle of the night to perform my prayers. I used to be able to stay up right until morning, but my body can no longer take it so after that I sleep until Luqman wakes up again for his next round of milk, which is normally not long after. And then my day repeats. 

Oh, no, I digress. But seriously, after reading all of that, can you see me slotting in brisk walking anywhere? Nowhere?

  xxx

Because of that, I tried searching for alternative work-out ideas that might work for full time working mothers and wives like myself. I had to make sure that I got more exercise, in whatever way possible. People say that you've got to find the time, right?

And that's when I came across Freeletics Malaysia (on Instagram). 

They have this program (previously free) where they would suggest an exercise routine daily which you have to complete under a certain number of minutes. Since they also suggested a routine for beginners (I assume like myself), I decided to give it a try. 

75 jumping jacks (sounds like aerobics hari sukan to me!)

30 squats (berak pun squat kan, how hard can it be??)

30 burpees (burpees sound so cute!)

30 seconds planking (30 seconds je kecoh?)

I basically spoke too soon. I'm definitely not even a beginner!!! Definitely below par!

After I tried all of the above, not at all minding the time (except for the planking part), my body basically got a shock of it's life! Jumping jacks are no longer fun, I never knew how crazy difficult doing squats can be, there's nothing cute about burpees and those were most probably the longest 30 seconds of my life!

I didn't continue with the other routines for the days after that because my whole body ached so badly and I was suffering heartburn and was constantly gassy. I even thought I was pregnant! Yes, that's how badly I was affected and how unfit my body really, actually is!

I know I shouldn't give up just yet, but don't you think it's just too extreme for me to jump into the whole thing when I am getting zilch nada zero exercise right now? I think if I am currently exercising (even just a little bit), those routines wouldn't have been so difficult for me. I wish I could figure out a way to just slot in brisk walking somewhere in that tight schedule because I've tried my best to walk to everywhere; bank, shop, everywhere, but nothing seems to work!

Unless this means I'll be seeing double bars when my Ms P is due at the end of this month? (don't think so)...

But until then... I'm seriously bummed as to what I should do. 

Sincerely, Confused Ms Snug (size) 8.

p.s.: my journey will now be under a new label linked here!

what happens when I reach 51.

I've been harping on and on and on about wanting to buy a treadmill since early this year and my husband has been kind enough to look up on a few options so that we could make an informed purchase. 

Lucky for us, one of our friends was thinking of selling off his, so we were able to query more about the product; its performance and functions and price and all. 

When we came to the question of why our friend was selling it off... he said,

"Tak dan nak lari..."

And when I heard that, I was like... "and my working hours are longer than yours, so makes me think I'd make it home on time for a run on the treadmill?"

So, Treadmill Plan Abort lah jawabnya. 

xxx

BUT, having said that, I didn't abort my Healthy 2014 Plan, though ironically, my lifestyle is becoming more and more unhealthy. Bangun, tidur, sit all day at work, go home, do chores at home then sleep. And suddenly, my weight reached 51kgs and we all know what happens when it reaches 51... it won't go down!!! Oh my, oh my, what have I done??? Why did I allow my weight to reach 51!!!

At the rate I'm going, I'm so afraid I might have to spend my retirement in pain (touchwood!) and knowing how much I would hate that, I knew I had to take things into my own hands... or rather... feet. 

Introducing you to my "treadmill" -

7 floors of staircases from basement up daily. Not sure whether it has gotten easier or whether I've gotten better at it, but I look forward to this everyday now! *flips tudung!*

And this, my fellow staircasians, is a pitstop, which is not surprising since this building goes 15 floors up (minus the basement). BYO (drink of choice), though. Don' t take my word for it though, because people actually use this as a smoking bay, so you might just die from being a secondary smoker while trying to get healthy. I may have to buy a new "treadmill" because of this... *sigh*

And did you see my exercise gear; aren't those "sport shoes" the prettiest! Miahahahaha!

Speaking of which... when did sport shoes become so very expensive? When? Why? How? What happened??? I know that I've been a little bit out of touch from the "sporty" world, but just about 3 years ago, I still managed to bag a pair of Topper futsal shoes for RM100 and Nike running shoes for RM150. Now, they're selling for RM500! Who buys them anymore??? Okay, maybe you do since you're not so cheapskate like me but putting RM500 worth on your feet... all my hard earned money... Sigh. 

But anyways, since I started my "treadmill" journey, I find myself being happier and feeling a whole load better about myself. I was an athlete in school so having baggage all around my midriff, thighs and everywhere else is new to me, so please forgive my obsession. But if you're at that stage in your life where you feel like there's nothing that can make you happy anymore, I recommend you to try exercising, I am serious. Exercise releases endorphins and endorphins make us happy. 

The only thing not really making me happy is that... I'm still at 51! And I think right now, I may have to figure out which part I literally need to carve out.

But meanwhile, nah, happy face setelah berjaya menawan Tingkat 4 Menara Usahawan! Hurrah!