SYMP.
I have been doing that all my life.
But Alhamdulillah, dengan menurut segala perintah, rezeki saya jadi murah; pintu rezeki, pintu hati dan pintu doa sentiasa terbuka untuk saya. Tak cukup dengan cakap Alhamdulillah saja, I know. Kesyukuran saya tinggi yang teramat, sampai tak tahu nak panjatkan kesyukuran macam mana lagi dah. Mungkin sujud syukur sekejap lagi.
At this point in time, despite everything, I feel like crying. Sebab terharu. Because despite everything, pintu rezeki dan pintu doa itu masih terbuka. Dilembutkan hati-hati orang di sekeliling saya kerana saya jujur menyatakan kerisauan saya. Semua kerana saya telah menurut perintah. As I have done all my life.
Last Friday Nadnad and I were talking about compromises. Iye, dalam pada kegilaan kami, we talk about serious stuff as well. She told me that if I know I cannot compromise where certain things are concerned, I should say so. I should put my foot down and go for it. And that I should do it fast. And heeding her advice, I went for it.
And I found that by dilly dallying (kerana menurut perintah) all this while, I have put myself in a compromising position. I don’t know how to put into words what I felt. How could I put myself in the most compromising position, EVER, when in the very first place, I was the one who so staunchly said that I wouldn’t?
I was so angry, I felt like pointing my finger at everyone else. I wanted to find fault in everyone around me because I KNEW it wasn’t my fault. I just wanted to shout to everyone, “WHY DON’T YOU CARE ENOUGH TO LISTEN?” But I didn’t. I knew that I shouldn’t. Dosa buat begitu.
So, I just went on with my life and did what I could – whether or not I compromised is a different matter altogether. And because saya menurut perintah, everything is back on track, Alhamdulillah. Pintu rezeki tidak tertutup untuk orang yang bersabar dan terus berdoa.
I know now that though many people have the best intentions, they may not exactly know what’s best for us. Saya tetap menurut perintah seperti biasa, but from this point onwards, I’m going to move in my own way.
Dan walaupun setiap surat yang keluar dari office ini menyatakan “Saya Yang Menurut Perintah”, this is not about work.
P.S: happier updates are on the way. tunggu ye? :)
But Alhamdulillah, dengan menurut segala perintah, rezeki saya jadi murah; pintu rezeki, pintu hati dan pintu doa sentiasa terbuka untuk saya. Tak cukup dengan cakap Alhamdulillah saja, I know. Kesyukuran saya tinggi yang teramat, sampai tak tahu nak panjatkan kesyukuran macam mana lagi dah. Mungkin sujud syukur sekejap lagi.
At this point in time, despite everything, I feel like crying. Sebab terharu. Because despite everything, pintu rezeki dan pintu doa itu masih terbuka. Dilembutkan hati-hati orang di sekeliling saya kerana saya jujur menyatakan kerisauan saya. Semua kerana saya telah menurut perintah. As I have done all my life.
Last Friday Nadnad and I were talking about compromises. Iye, dalam pada kegilaan kami, we talk about serious stuff as well. She told me that if I know I cannot compromise where certain things are concerned, I should say so. I should put my foot down and go for it. And that I should do it fast. And heeding her advice, I went for it.
And I found that by dilly dallying (kerana menurut perintah) all this while, I have put myself in a compromising position. I don’t know how to put into words what I felt. How could I put myself in the most compromising position, EVER, when in the very first place, I was the one who so staunchly said that I wouldn’t?
I was so angry, I felt like pointing my finger at everyone else. I wanted to find fault in everyone around me because I KNEW it wasn’t my fault. I just wanted to shout to everyone, “WHY DON’T YOU CARE ENOUGH TO LISTEN?” But I didn’t. I knew that I shouldn’t. Dosa buat begitu.
So, I just went on with my life and did what I could – whether or not I compromised is a different matter altogether. And because saya menurut perintah, everything is back on track, Alhamdulillah. Pintu rezeki tidak tertutup untuk orang yang bersabar dan terus berdoa.
I know now that though many people have the best intentions, they may not exactly know what’s best for us. Saya tetap menurut perintah seperti biasa, but from this point onwards, I’m going to move in my own way.
Dan walaupun setiap surat yang keluar dari office ini menyatakan “Saya Yang Menurut Perintah”, this is not about work.
P.S: happier updates are on the way. tunggu ye? :)
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