February 26, 2014

my life just got... interesting.

Most of the time, I consider myself to be nothing out of the ordinary. I have really good days, and really bad ones, and most days are okay, so I make the best out of what I have.

For a long time now, people have been telling me what a positive person I seem to be. From what they see, I am one of those who has one of the lightest takes on life, since they hardly see me angry or sad.

Thing is, like I said, I have really good days and really bad ones. And I also happen to have a brain.

See, our mind is something we are in absolute control of. Only you can decide how you want to look at things and how you want to feel about something and most importantly, how to react to something. Of course there are surrounding circumstances which may affect your outlook, but bottom line is that you've been given that brain to filter. So, why don't you filter?

When people ask me why I can be SO chillax about certain things, my answer is simple.

"I don't have the energy to be angry."

No matter how angry I get at something, I always assess that anger before actually getting angry; is this worth the "rent space" in my head? I think about this very thoroughly because I have been absolutely angry before; both over very important and overly trivial matters. And for those overly trivial matters, I realise how silly I was to materialise my thoughts into anger. At the end of the day, it drained me of all my energy and it wasn't even worth it to begin with. Plus, it's true when they say "anger breeds anger". It's also true what they say about "a moment of anger, a lifetime of regret". These are the 2 things I hold on to whenever I feel like flipping the table when someone annoys me. You can't take back what you say/write because the damage would have already been done by then. So, filter. Filter your thoughts and your feelings.

But of course, I am not perfect. On some days, I just lose it. When I'm too tired, I just lose it. When things don't go as I hoped it would, I lose it. Those are my really bad days. And on my really bad days, I feel like crap when I snap and raise my voice for things which I SHOULD be in control over, but fail to miserably. 

However, bottom line is that I TRY. 

Despite being relatively "positive-vibed", I guess I can't please everyone. 

This most definitely doesn't deserve rent space anywhere, but I found it too amusing not to be made public.


Sabar je lah.

And no, I don't know who the sender is, but who cares! Hahah. HAPPY Wednesday to all!


3 comments:

Anonymous said...

If you're really on stalker mode, get Wechat. They'd tell you the name that appears in your mobile contacts. That number belongs to some girl named Ruby Chang? Just incase you're curious ;P

I'm sorry this happened to you. You seem like a sweet girl. And no one deserves to be called a bitch.

Haneesa said...

Wow! You checked! Haha. I don't know anybody by the name of Ruby Chang and no clue as to who might be using that as a nickname. And frankly it doesn't really matter hehehh. But yes, I agree that nobody deserves to be called a bitch, no matter what it is that I may have or may not have done to Ruby Ruby Ruby ;p

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