November 26, 2014

my heart breaks a little when I hear your name.

This morning, I woke up earlier than normal. I didn't plan on it but after the final susu request from Luqman for the night (circa 4.30 a.m.), I just couldn't get back to sleep, so I decided to do some reading. 

When I was taking a breather, I turned to face one of the walls in the bedroom. And I saw a small bag, which carries one of the things I've always loved (which I still very much love) sitting pretty on the shelves. And if you haven't already guessed, that bag contains Theodore. 

I'm not sure how many times Theodore has been mentioned in this blog, but I know it's ALOT (he even has as label of his own here and even then, I've missed some posts). In fact, in my younger years, I always talked about how much I missed Theodore each time I accidentally left him at home or had no choice but not to let him tag along with me to wherever I was going. I talked about Theodore like he was a real person, like a baby, like a best friend. 

However, after having a real baby of my own (which I don't at all regret by the way), I found it increasingly difficult to pay any attention to Theodore at all. It just wasn't possible to carry a 14 kilo baby while also lugging around a DSLR everywhere, no matter how ideal the thought of that situation is. 

I have thought about selling him off before, but I just couldn't bring myself to part with him because he had become such a huge part of me, even when I no longer use him as often as I used to or as often as I'd like. He's one of those things which has made a mark in so many important areas of my life like my relationship and financial independence, for instance...

Plus, there were times when he came in handy, although I've got to admit that the most recent photos I took with Theodore have remained in it, due to it's lack of mobility or rather the lack of space in my bag (as you-know-who has conveniently taken over our lives for good, hehe).

So, with all my reluctance to let it go yet not exactly having enough time and energy to put it to good use, Theodore has been sitting idly on the shelves, where he doesn't belong.  

A few months back, my sister wanted my opinion on which camera she should consider buying in view of her growing projects and without a moment of hesitation, I offered her mine

For free.

(yes, isn't she lucky?)

I'm thinking, if I had to give it away/sell it off, it better be passed on to good, loving hands, right?

And I can't think of anyone better than my sister.

And just in case you're wondering why I had to post this... it's just to make things final in writing, so that I don't look back on my decision. Also, I had to get rid of that niggling feeling of sadness each time I think of how underutilised Theodore is (though I know that it's not for long now!) and of how hard I worked to get it. 

For now, I know that this is the best decision for everyone. 

And if Theodore could talk, I bet he is jumping with joy right now, because who wouldn't want to be jet-setting off to different places with Adik on her archi-adventures?

There. I said it.

Now, I can pass Theodore on in peace. I think


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