the one with the flying trains.

It's been a while since I last posted anything about Luqman, hasn't it? I've been complaining about work and weight gain and all things else, it almost seems like I've "lost touch" where being a mother is concerned. Or have I?

Truth is... of course I haven't! That's the most absurd thought! But honestly, after he hit the 18-month mark, it has been a little bit difficult to keep up with his developments to the T because he has become so (pleasantly) unpredictable! Hence, I took every day as it came and posted his daily antics on Instagram since he has so many aunties there who continuously wonder what he's up to. And since they were so kind to me throughout my pregnancy and beyond, I feel like I owe it to them :)

But I think this story is one that's worth telling.

Yesterday evening, when we got home, Luqman wouldn't let me do anything else apart from playing with him. After how he spent the weekends getting abundance of extra attention from his paternal grandparents and his uncles and aunty, I kind of anticipated that he would expect me to keep up the (attention) momentum. 

Since we're on some sort of a "TV-fast" at the moment, I decided that the best thing to do was to just entertain him because a happy baby makes a mommy happy, yes?

So we played. He has a set of favourite things that he cannot do without, some of which are his trains and cars, so we sat down and imagined that the trains were going through Daddy Mountain (basically my husband was forced to lie down sideways while we used his body as a track) where they would then take off and fly into the air onto Black Baby Mountain (our black sofabed) and from thereon they would chase the Baby (Luqman) who had to run away from those flying trains and the cars who were also ganging up against Baby. So he had to be fast to avoid being hit by them. 

(hahahahah insert amused icon) 

I felt like that that was the silliest story I have ever made up but you should have seen how frantic Luqman was, running away from the "flying" trains and the cars that were "chasing" him. Hahahah.

After such an fruitful playtime session, he slept like a log (expected) and I too, slept like a log. 

It was about 4.30 a.m. when I noticed him stirring in his sleep. He turned towards me and landed his palms on my cheeks and he then started touching my nose. I saw him peering through slit eyes to make sure that it was really me. And then he started laughing! It wasn't the scary kind of laugh, it was the kind of laugh he'd give every time he was thoroughly enjoying himself. And because I didn't know how to react... I laughed along with him!

from Pinterest.

HAHAHAHAHA, seriously the things that mothers do!

After all that laughing, he told me he wanted some milk so, I told him to wait while I made some for him. 

When I came back, I laid beside him while he finished his milk and as I was about to slip away from him (I no longer felt like sleeping), he turned towards me and plopped his right leg over my body. The more I inched away, the closer to me he came. And again, he would peer through slit eyes to confirm that I was still there with him.

xxx

I admit that I sometimes get a little frustrated with how clingy he is, especially with me. While he would let his Daddy read or do work in peace, with me it's a different scenario altogether. Mama only breathes and lives for Luqman (which really, isn't that far from the truth). But just like other women, I like my moment of solitude; the occasional uninterrupted bath time, some time to read books, going online on the laptop at home, you know... the likes... and having a clingy child limits you from doing those things. 

But I guess nothing can beat the feeling of having someone love you so boundlessly, right? I constantly remind myself that this phase shall pass and in time... I'm going to miss this constant neediness. I'm going to miss him calling me "Mama" in that particular tone when he wants something from me and that although he's all bright and smart (I'm naturally biased), he really is... very, very little. And most importantly, I was the one who decided on having him by choice (and of course with Allah's will), so why should he suffer my impatience and my selfish needs?

xxx

With him being 26 months now, every day is a new adventure for us. Every day is a learning process, not just for him, but also for me. Like I said, I take every day as it comes. Because with everything happening around us in the world right now, I don't know if today would be my last day, or his.

Cherish the love we have. We should cherish the life we live.

Especially the one with the flying trains ;)