June 03, 2013

those 10 days in May.

There were some 10 days in May where I rediscovered the joys of motherhood under the most tragic circumstances. Why tragic? Because my boy was diagnosed with the much dreaded Hand Foot Mouth Disease (HFMD).

Plus, it was a bit crazy that we were quarantined and weren't allowed to leave the house under strict orders of the Doctor. It was tiring because my boy was clingy because he wasn't feeling well, but be that as it may, being able to stay home and watch him grow and heal right before my eyes was just priceless. Priceless, priceless, priceless.

I'll admit that I thought about quitting my job more than once in the span of those 10 days. And that coming from me, is huge.

Now, it's been three weeks since I went back to work and every now and then, I still think about leaving my job to care for my family.

But, the way I see it, what I'm doing now is also tantamount to caring for my family; just in a different way. If I don't work, I won't be able to earn. And if I don't earn, I can no longer walk into Mothercare or Toys R Us and come out bearing clothes and toys for my son. And that will kill me. Even if my husband had the money, it really wouldn't give me the same satisfaction, I am sure. So, it really is not that easy after all.

Still... there are days when I wished I could relive those 10 days, record every single moment of it. And keep it in a bottle. So that I could always revisit whenever I feel like I'm missing out too much on my motherhood.

4 comments:

saliha said...

me jg my hubby yg kne hfmd ni.. sounds funny but diz disease adult pun bole kne but too rare

Haneesa said...

Saliha: Oh memang rare tapi kitorang rasa kitorang pun infected haritu since gatal-gatal and kulit naik merah-merah jugak while in quarantine. Tp mungkin tak sampai tahap kronik la :)

yayahafiza said...

now days, everything needs money.... i remember, i spoke to one of my friend before, he even said, i think i need to get married to a working wife or else, its hard to survive now days.... it may sounds funny but it is true.... he's not 'taking advantage' but that is the reality.... and from my observation, working mom more careful when spending :)

Haneesa said...

aera: oh yes, i don't think he would be taking advantage if he wanted a working wife. i think it's realistic. at least kalau dia tak ambil duit wife dia pun, wife dia boleh belanja duit sendiri if they need or want anything. kalau nak jadi housewife memang kena tahan la i guess unless husband kita earning thousands and thousands of bucks... sigh... working mom dilemma yang tak akan sudah2. about the more cafeful when spending tu... haha, depends la kot. but for me, careful means kalau dah beli barang anak, barang sendiri tak payah pun tak apa ;)