March 13, 2015

even heroes have the right to bleed.


3 and a 1/2 months gone in a blink of an eye. 

Like all previous years, this first quarter too has been a rather hectic one as the workload began to re-pile onto my work station after everyone else returned from their long, long year-end break. 

Though that was pretty much expected, this week, for some reason, was just extra taxing.

So taxing that I actually (rather mysteriously) broke down into tears this morning when I heard the slightest tinge of a raised voice during a work discussion. Since when did I become so sensitive?

To avoid making an unnecessary scene, I excused myself as fast as I possibly could by giving some fumbled but rather credible excuse of wanting to do further research. But even as I was making that escape, tears were welling up in my eyes and before I could reach my "secure place" (I'll leave that to your imagination), the full-blown waterworks began.

After minutes of trying to calm myself down and failing miserably at stopping the waterworks, I SOS-ed "my person", all the while hoping that he'd be able to peel himself away from the meeting for just a little while because I really did need him at the time.

Sensing that something was amiss (we hardly ever communicate during office hours unless absolutely necessary), he temporarily left his meeting to tend his seething, crying wife, bless the man. 

I let it all out; tears and words all fumbled and muffled in between my sobs and frustration at everything that was making me mad. And as I anticipated, after all that was over, I was back to my old self again. 

Thank God that I was born with eyes that don't go puffy even after all that crying, so soon after, I was able to rejoin the discussion like nothing ever happened.

Everything turned out okay in the end. There were no more raised voices (or maybe the first time was really my imagination) and all works was done and submitted within the stipulated timeline. 

And though I don't normally go out for lunch, today I did. Alone. Didn't eat anything but instead bought myself some good coffee, a book and some apples to munch. 

Came back to the office much happier and calmer and also slightly amused at my own earlier silliness. 

But I guess even heroes have the right to bleed, ey?

Here's to hoping that this weekend would be a great time to catch on some sleep, though I doubt it since tomorrow morning's going to start with our contractors installing lights in our soon-to-be home! 

More on the new house when times are better in sha Allah, but for now,


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